Love is All We Have Left
by CookiesRmine
Summary: The galaxy is torn apart by the reaper war, and a relationship that was once strong seems to be out of reach. Garrus searches the galaxy for his loved needle in the huge haystack. Kiana seems to be lost forever. Will she ever be found? Sequel to The Beginning of the End. Rated M just to be safe. MASS EFFECT IS BIOWARE'S.
1. Chapter 1

~Love is All We Have Left~

Story~ Belongs to me

Background~ My view of after Mass Effect 3, Garrus and Shepard pairing.

Disclaimer~ I own the added storyline at the end of Mass Effect 3

NOTE: Some flashbacks take place in the Mass Effect games. BIOWARE owns this Mass GALAXY, except my Shepard and any additional characters that you do not see in the Mass Effect Games.

These ~~~ are beginnings and at ends of flashbacks

NONPROFIT~ This is just for fun. :)

CHAPTER 1~ RESUGENCE

NOVEMBER 13th ,2186 04:23am

Earth.

Home world of the prosperous Human race. Now lay in ruin. Distant generations of prosperity, health, and long lost history, now lay in heaps of cobble across the globe. Other worlds of this kind, destroyed. Families torn. Friendships broken apart. Races nearly extinct. The victory was won, but the battle for survival is hanging thick in the cloudy air.

London.

Once a rich land with beautiful streets and towers built by hand, now destroyed and vaporized into rubble. The cold air was heavy and the clouds in the sky lay thick with smoke and fumes of gunfire.

Silence.

It was deafening in the dead of the early morning. As days went by the sun never shone through the bush of clouds covering most of London's city. Blue sky was never seen. Birds were never heard. The smell of smoke and rock hover in every corner.

Life.

Slowly, a life form thought to be dead, emerges from the cobble of stone. Barely alive and breathing. Barely awake and moving. The savior of the Galaxy. Wandering helplessly. Not knowing where she is.

Alone.

No person or living creature in sight. No insect, nor bird or Human alive.

Dead.

A woman as dead as death itself. No where to go. Death's smell filled her nose. Death was everywhere. Not one thing on the ground was alive. Not even a tiny dandelion growing in a crack in the concrete was alive.

Shadows.

The shadows followed her wherever she went. The shadows made her alert and aware...

Darkness.

No light shone on the street in the dark. Darkness overtook the light. It swallowed any pigment of brightness anywhere. In every corner darkness made it's self known.

Light...

Walking down a street.. A sudden bright light...

Rescue.

It was in her midst around her. Now she knew, she could let go...

~ON THE NORMANDY~

Garrus held the plaque up to the wall.

Pausing to run a hand across the name engraved in it.

He knew this was his call..

She was still alive.

He felt it in his heart.

She wouldn't leave without a good-bye.

His heart said one thing.

While his mind said another...

In this moment.

The decision was clear.

Turning he glanced at each one of the crew.

Each, waiting for an explanation.

Each, wanting something more than a plaque on a wall to honor her.

Garrus looked back down at the plaque in his hand.

It was useless to speak.

Nothing needed to be said.

Yet, something had to be done.

Each one nodded in agreement.

Each one followed him.

Each one had followed her.

Thus, the search begins...

NOVEMBER 15th ,2186

A knocking came from outside the captain's cabin.

"Garrus, I know you're upset, but, please come out. We need you on the bridge."

Liara's soft and pleading voice still wasn't convincing him. Ever since the Normandy retreated from Earth and took off through a relay that nearly fried the ship, Garrus was in more emotional pain than physical. He'd been wounded, but his physical pain didn't even compare to the damage taken to his mental self.

As he sat in silence, Garrus ran a talon over the engraved tags. Her tags. His mind took him to a place he didn't want to go...

"_Normandy! Do you copy? I need an evac. Right now! " Shepard reported and carried Garrus as Liara followed closely behind. _

_She carried him until they reached the Normandy's cargo hold. "Here, take him." Kiana said to Liara and gently eased his weight off of her and to Liara."Shepard." "You've got to get out of here, Garrus." _

"_And you've got to be kidding me." "There's no time to debate!" _

_Garrus looked down, he having trouble staying on his feet. The pain in both of their eyes. The realization of separating when they'd always had each other's backs was horrifying. "We're in this together till the end."_

"_No matter what happens here..." Kiana steps toward Garrus and runs her hand across his mandible. _

"_I love you, I always have, and I always will." "Kiana..."_

_One last glimpse... They stared at each other and took in one last long look. Printing each other's faces in their minds. "I.. love you too." _

_Kiana quickly reached into her neck collar and took off her tags, placing them in his hand as she kisses his forehead. _

_Backing away and looking behind her she yelled for them to go. Garrus was eying her. Taking in her form and watched her disappear into the horde._

_Little did he know that that was the last time he'd set eyes on her for a very long time..._

"Garrus!" Liara called softly.

Garrus continued to stare at the name and looked up and around the room. He got up and a very startled Liara stood shocked outside of the door. She hadn't been expecting him to come out...

Garrus gripped the tags tighter and his mandibles twitched as he walked past her and entered the elevator. Liara peeked her head inside the cabin. Taking a glance at the fish tank that was illuminating the dark room. She hadn't been in here for a long while and decided to snoop.

Liara cautiously walked in and made sure not to touch anything. She sighed when she saw a pile of clothes, most likely dirty ones, lying on the floor beside the bathroom door. Kiana had never known what to do with clothing.

She had been so used to wearing armor that she hadn't been fond of clothing. Liara picked up an N7 sweatshirt that was lying on top of the pile. She bowed her head a bit and thought of all the times Shepard had worn it. Liara sighed and put the sweatshirt back. Feeling something tugging at her chest, she backed away.

Now wasn't the time...

For the next couple weeks, Garrus fell into a state of anger and in a way, depression. He felt that his life didn't hold any special purpose. Deep in his heart he knew Kiana was still alive, but his head was telling him it was all pointless.

The galaxy had been torn apart apart from the war. Not only that, but the Normandy was running low on fuel and was mostly running on power saver energy. Most of the lights were off, making it harder to navigate through the ship. Garrus 'needed' to work on the ship's gunnery system to get them working again, but- he couldn't get to doing it.

Just working on the calibrations in the battery reminded him or her...

_Knocking came from the Main Battery door and Garrus didn't bother turning to see who it was. He could hear her steady footsteps feet away from the door. He had already memorized her smooth steps she took as she walked toward the door. _

_His obsession had escalated since he felt like they were.. almost like, in Human terms, an item. It didn't comfort his stomach to think that he was actually in love. Never before had he ever felt these emotions except with Shepard._

_Never in his life had he ever met someone like her. Strong, faithful, obedient to friends, kind, respectful, caring, violent, slick. She had the flexibility AND the reach. Thus, he fell in love with her. To him he wasn't sure why he'd fallen in love with her even though the answer was dangling above his head._

"_Hmm?" Garrus called. The door opened and Shepard walked in behind him. She slid a hand up and down his shoulder comfortingly. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. How are you holding up?" She whispered and looked into his eyes. _

"_I'm in the middle of some-" "Calibrations? Garrus-" She stopped herself, knowing that he just needed time. Palaven was rough to see, and even being on its moon and not the planet itself was brutal. "She forced him to face her and saw the pain and worry in his eyes. Running a hand over his scarred mandible she hugged him tightly and laid her head on his chest. _

_He wrapped his arms around her and laid his cheek on the top of her head. Kiana reached up and stroked his fringe..._

_May 16th ,2187 _

The Normandy made it to a far off system near Thessia that was mostly now inhabited by Cerberus troops. They managed to get around Cerberus and find the locals. The locals helped the crew fuel the Normandy and repair the major damages from the crucible blast. For three whole months the ship stayed on the planet until they were able to take off for Illium.

That was three months ago, February.

The Normandy landed on Illium and they immediately noticed the damage that still lingered on the planet. Somehow, someone heard that the Normandy was on Illium and the one who was commanding it, was summoned to a meeting with Illium security. Garrus was afraid they'd be taken into custody of some sort.

Garrus decided it was a good idea to go. He brought Liara with him and was led by security to some offices. Thinking of all the possibilities of what might happen at the moment. He watched the guards open the door and Garrus stared in disbelief at what he saw.

"Bailey?" "Yeah, yeah. Close your mouth and stop gaping." "How did you escape the Citadel?" Garrus stepped in the room and Liara seemed to be hesitant. "Well," Bailey said while he got out of his chair, "the Citadel had been evacuated when it was moved to London. Every person and family possible moved into London. I had been scheduled to leave Earth before anything happened in London. I wanted to stay and fight, but I was needed here."

Garrus nodded and Liara tapped his shoulder. "I'm going to go look around in the area and see if there's anything I can help with." As she turned to leave Garrus chuckled. "Are you bringing Javik with you?" Looking over her shoulder, glaring she replied with a stale 'no' and walked out of the room.

"What I want to know, Vakarian, is why you're here." Bailey lent on his desk and lifted a mug to his lips. "Honestly, I am here for extra parts for the Normandy and what relays you've been working on."

Bailey nodded and waved a hand. "We've gotten the Sol Relay to work and it's connected straight to the Crescent Nebula. It didn't take long to repair two relays, but I have a feeling we won't get to ALL of the relays online in just a couple of months. We're working on the Krogan DMZ and the Athena Nebula. They'll both take about a year more to repair. Some were more damaged than others. How did you guys get here anyway?"

Garrus shrugged. "It's a long story. We got through the Athena Relay before we got caught in the crucible's blast. After we'd been hit. we went to one of the nearby colonies and supplied from some of the locals. We then went on our way and took a rough six months to get here." Bailey nodded, Garrus shifted his weight on his feet as Bailey continued to talk. His mind was spinning again. How would she have handled the problem? Her notion would probably have been a bit of negotiation and a lot of compromise. She would have been calm and collective about it and set her jaw to ensure she didn't open her mouth and speak her mind.

Garrus had a hard time doing all of these things. He'd just lost his best friend, mentor, lover, the woman he loved. The bitter chill that ran up his spine made him quiver with anger and frustration. Not knowing whether she was still alive and breathing was frustrating. The first place to look would be Earth.

Garrus turned his head when he saw another Turian enter the room. He had white clan markings and a tight set jaw. He sported the blue C-sec uniform and a military posture. He saluted and spoke lowly to Bailey. They spoke for a couple more minutes before the Turian saluted and left the room.

"Damn it." Bailey muttered and ran a hand over his face. He looked up and something in his eyes lit up and it looked as if he was putting together an idea. Garrus started to dislike the look on Bailey's face. He knew that he was in for it big time. "Why didn't I think of it before?" Bailey muttered and shook his head. "You're like a war hero on Palaven, am I right?" Garrus raised a brow plate. "It's sort of like that I suppose."

He thought of what Kiana would have said about that... probably, "Cocky Turian" or, "damn right".

Bailey clapped his hands together and grinned widely. "This is on the bottom of my list, but it would be nice to get it off of my shoulders. I have a young male Turian that we caught snooping in the offices. He won't speak or even look at us and he refuses to tell us who he is where his parents are.

It's frustrating. Since you're a good example of your people I'm thinking maybe you can get him to talk.

Garrus stood, stunned. He'd only dealt with a teen in his C-sec years, but that was once! He scratched at his scarred mandible. "Eerrm, I guess." "Great! Corporal Queene, take Commander Vakarian to section AD3." As Garrus started to leave the room Bailey caught his attention again. "Oh, Vakarian. We call the kid Casper." Garrus gave Bailey a strange look and Bailey rolled his eyes. "It's a long story." The Human officer that Bailey had called appeared and saluted. Garrus followed the Corporal to the room holding 'Casper'.

On his way through the various hallways Garrus was thinking of things he would say. He recited words and statements over and over in his mind. It had become a habit when he was on the way up to Shepard's cabin. He'd go over what he would say and what reactions might be. He learned in his early C-sec years that teenagers were unpredictable. You have no idea how they'll react or respond.

Once they reached the room, everything that Garrus had planned to say suddenly faded away in an instant. He had forgotten his plan and was left with a pin's point of courage. Taking a deep breath, Garrus entered the room and saw the boy sitting on the floor near a window that overlooked some of the vast planet's city.

Garrus stopped abruptly, and the door closed behind him. He couldn't turn back now. What was he so afraid of? The kid biting his head off or the boy hating him? Garrus quickly thought of what she would have done in a situation like this. Garrus carefully approached 'Casper' and sat down next to him.

For a while Garrus sat there. Not sure of what to say to this kid. Casper didn't even look up from the floor when Garrus had entered the room. He was probably in shock from the war and he probably does not know where his parents are. Garrus was in somewhat of the same situation.

He did not know what condition his mother was in and where his family was. He desperately hoped they were alright, but most of all he did not know where the love of his life was or even if she was alive. Shrugging off the thoughts that twisted his stomach from side to side, he got up and looked out the window at the planet that was still recovering.

He was not surprised. The whole galaxy was still recovering from the war. "So," Garrus started confidently, "Casper," Garrus said while kneeling next to the boy, "look, I know you are alone. Most of us are. I know that you're confused, but the only way we can figure out what to do with you is if you tell me who you are." The boy nicknamed Casper, continued to sit completely still and didn't look up.

"It's alright to tell me. I'm in the same situation as you." Garrus sat down and looked toward the ceiling. "I don't know where my parents and sister are, my best friend is missing. I don't know what to do next, but someone told me a long time ago that, "If you're down and lost, get back up and find your way."

"The next thing I knew, I was on my feet and back on track. I think you could do the same thing, Cas." Garrus looked over at the boy and noticed his bright green eyes and maroon-red clan markings. "Who are you?" Casper asked nervously and his eyes wandered over Garrus' scarred face and chipped armor.

"Garrus Vakarian-" Casper's eyes widened and when Garrus turned, Casper hid his expression with a tight mandibled frown. "You're that guy who worked with Commander Shepard and took down Saren, the Collectors, and the Reapers right?" Garrus nodded and scratched at one of his new scars that ran down his neck. "Hhmm, yeah." Garrus looked down and thought of Shepard again. There was not one hour that went by that he never thought of her. "What? You not happy that you saved the galaxy?"

Garrus looked back up at 'Casper' and shook his head. "It's not that-" "Then what is it?" The young Turian stared int his eyes. Tormenting him to say something. The truth most likely. Garrus glared at the ceiling and kept his mouth shut. If he started talking he would not be able to stop. He hated reality. It was slowly but surely eating holes into him.

"Casper-" "Tarek, it's Tarek." Garrus nodded slowly, "Tarek, I lost a lot of friends months ago. I lost people who were so close to me they were like family. Some were closer than that." Looking down Garrus took off a glove and scratched a star on the metal floor with a talon.

Tarek watched him and marveled. He knew not to speak when an adult didn't look happy, but Garrus didn't look angry, he defiantly wasn't happy, but he seemed more upset or sad than anything. "There's a friend, I don't even know if she's still alive. She's out there, but I don't know where."

Tarek looked over at the strange marking Garrus made on the floor and glanced back up at Garrus. "Why don't you just look for her?" Tarek asked and Garrus shrugged. "The relay to Earth is up, but... part of me does not want to find her dead." Tarek scoffed. "Wouldn't it be better just to find out rather than not knowing at all?"

Garrus started to grind his teeth and his chest started to hurt after the thought of finding her limp body under some rubble. His mandibles started to throb from holding them so tight against his face. At this point what would Shepard have done if he was missing? Would she look for him or sit around, afraid of what she would find. Of course she would look. He is just being selfish. He didn't want to find a body...

Yet, there was a small chance he would not find a body. "My parents...died before my eyes. I'm all alone now. I don't have anyone else, but.." Garrus started to feel a little embarrassed. He wasn't here to tell Tarek about his problems, he was here to listen to the kid's problems.

"How old are you, kid?" Garrus glanced up and Tarek picked at his pants. "Fifteen." Garrus nodded. This kid wasn't too bad. He'd heard that a lot of kids these days are raised poorly and had nasty attitudes toward adults and authority, but this kid was pretty respectable. Something told him that Tarek was raised under military influence. "So, who was your father?" Garrus asked, Tarek's green eyes wandered the room.

"He was a soldier. One of the best in my opinion. He was a big techy. His job in the Turian military was engineering and he was great at building and fixing things. He loved weapons though, anything shiny was his favorite." Tarek chuckled and looked to the floor. " Major Rezdor Lynxsus, that was my father."

"What about your mother?" Garrus asked while glancing toward the window and back at Tarek. " My mom stayed home with me most of the time when the Reapers were on Palaven. It was awful, but she always reassured me. It was her job I guess, but yeah..." Garrus let it sink in before asking the worst question.

"How did they-" "A shuttle explosion. My parents put me in a shuttle with some soldiers and other passengers evacuating Palaven. My parents stayed with my dad's men and some other passengers on another shuttle. They were trying to make sure that if anything happened to their shuttle that I would be safe.. They were right. As soon as we went into outer atmosphere a blast exploded their shuttle."

Tarek stared at the ceiling, his green eyes telling the terrible story with a waver in his voice. "It was the worst thing I will ever experience in my life." Garrus put a hand on the boy's shoulder and a soft understanding purr erupted from Garrus' chest. "I'm sorry, but I know that's not enough." Garrus stood up and Tarek glanced up at him.

Garrus headed to the door. "Where are you going?" Tarek called after him and got to his feet too. Garrus turned his head over his shoulder, "To find my friend." Tarek stared out the door as Garrus left.

"Wait!"

EARTH

_May 18th 2187_

Garrus exited the airlock and looked up and down the hallway that greeted them. Liara tapped him from behind when a man came toward them. The man was clad in an Alliance Admiral uniform and he looked rather exhausted, but a welcoming smile was at the corners of his lips. "Welcome, you're the crew of the Normandy, yes?" Garrus nodded. "Admiral Hackett, it's.. good to see you."

"Likewise, Vakarian. What is your business here on Earth?" Garrus was about to speak, but he got interrupted when Hackett raised a finger. "Wait, don't tell me... Let's go to my office, I have papers and construction contracts I need to sign." Hackett led them to his office. It wasn't a huge office, but it had a large conference table on one side of the room, on the other was a large window that revealed a city.. more like a "world" under construction.

Hackett shoved all the data pads to one side of the desk and laid his hands on it. Glancing between Liara and Garrus. "So, where is the rest of the crew?" Garrus stood by the window and listened to Liara explain their situation. "Well, um.. we have Kaiden, Joker, James, and Javik aboard. We do not know where everyone else is. We are here to find-"

"I know," Hackett ran a hand down his face and sighed, "There have been a lot of injured people coming and going from all the possible hospitals. We've tried tracking the most injured soldiers and people, but we can't identify most because of lost tags, destroyed fingerprint scanners, and lost computer profiles. We're still working on getting the extranet buoys online in the main systems."

While Liara and Hackett chattered on, Garrus had his eyes glazing out the window. He traced a couple of large cranes and suspension cables and such that were working on the neighbor building. Garrus started to think of the tags...

He reached into the front of his chest piece and pulled out the tags that hung around his neck. That last moment. If only he could have made her keep them. If only she had not thrown them to him that last time that he'd seen her...

It would be harder to find her now that she probably wouldn't be recognized when she was in bad condition. That is, if she is still alive. Hackett must have spoken to him, when he felt eyes on him. Looking over Garrus looked back down at the tags, took them off and slammed them on the desk.

"She gave these to me before she left." Garrus said as he sat down in the chair beside Liara.

Hackett's face grew compassionate and soft. He sat back in his chair and rested a hand on his chin.

"Hm." Liara shifted herself in the padded chair and picked up the tags. She frowned and ran a finger over the name engraved on them. "Commander Eveline Shepard." Liara mumbled and looked up at Hackett. "Do you have an idea of where to start looking for her?" Hackett shook his head. "If I were you I would start here on Earth. We have some of the best hospitals on the wards I can check up the best and most crowded hospitals. We've repaired most machines and hospital equipment and buildings to hospitalize the wounded.

I can also check some smaller, but more popular ward hospital housing. Hackett stood and spoke, "If you don't mind I need to get to some unfinished business." He saluted and walked out of the room. It was silent in the room for quite a while. Liara was staring at the tags, while Garrus' eyes scanned the floor.

He had to find her. His chest started throbbing and his hands were almost trembling. For the past few months Garrus was telling himself that he couldn't miss her, otherwise he would be an emotional wreck. Lately he had gotten a bit more anxious than usual. All he wanted to do was find her and hold her in his arms.

Liara must have noticed his distress, because she knelt in front of him and laid a hand on his shoulder. "Garrus, I know you're upset, but we will find her." Garrus didn't look at her, he didn't shake his head, he didn't speak. He just sat there in silence. He finally had to admit it to himself. He missed her...

More now than he ever had. Garrus stood up and Liara put the tags in his hand. "Here." He shook his head. "No, I don't need them." Liara grabbed his shoulder as he walked away and turned him around. "She gave them to you, Garrus." The tears in her eyes made his stomach sink to the floor. He had never seen Liara this upset since Thessia.

"She was a part of all of us, but you were more to her than you will ever know. After Tali..." Her pause made the air in the room stiffen. "After Tali's death, I had to do everything I could to make her happy and in a way, take Tali's place, but after Shepard told me how much she missed Tali... I knew I could never take her place in Shepard's heart." Garrus stood and watched a tear fall down Liara's face. She wiped it away and smiled. "My point is, even if you are apart for however long, when Shepard places someone in her heart no one can replace that place when it is temporarily or permanently empty."

"If you're worried that there will be no room in her heart for you when we find her, don't be. I know that she'll always have room in her heart for you." Garrus was speechless. He had nothing to say. His mouth, heart, and mind were dry. "Take them." She said once again and put them in his palm, folding his hand. She quickly wiped her tears away and walked out of the room.

Garrus was left standing alone, and soon an officer came in and gave him a list of hospitals.

On the docks

Garrus had waited in the docking bay for Liara and Javik long enough. His patience was running thin. He was tired of all the waiting. All waiting did was eat time, precious time. He tapped his foot and looked over at the nearest docking clock, It read 3:12pm. Garrus sighed and out of the corner of his eye he saw a blue figure and a more bulkier figure beside it.

He looked up and pushed off of the airlock door as Liara and Javik approached. "He didn't find anything in the hospitals. There are still hundreds of terribly wounded people here, Garrus. Even if we tried we wouldn't be able to find her." Garrus watched her fumble with her fingers and her eyes waver as she spoke. Nothing ticked him off more when he knew he was trying the impossible.

It was his will power that kept him going mostly.. or was it love? He wasn't sure, but at this rate they needed to keep looking. Garrus didn't reply. He turned and headed into the airlock. Javik gave Liara a reassuring look and a shoulder pat.

Garrus entered the CIC and headed straight toward the galaxy map. He heard footsteps following him, but he didn't stop to look or even guess who it was. "So, where are we going to start?" Tarek asked from behind Garrus' shoulder. "Not we, me and the crew, 'you' aren't necessarily included."

"Why not?" Tarek barked and went into defense mode. "I'm here for a reason right?" Garrus almost scoffed. This boy was here because he begged to come in the first place. He pleaded and said he had nowhere else to go. Garrus had simply sympathized. He hadn't realized that this boy was going to be any trouble in the first place, but he was more stubborn than he'd imagined.

"If you're going to complain, go to Liara. I don't do complaints. If I say you aren't included you're not included. Got it?" Garrus snapped and continued leaning forward on the railing. A massive headache was pounding on his head. The stress, frustration, and emotion was doing everything it could to break down the door and Garrus was desperately trying to keep it in.

Tarek

had marched his way to Liara quarters. In his mind he felt outraged. For all of his life he had been secluded from nearly everything. He had not been able to go with his father on trips. His mother never allowed him to visit other planets, see other races, until now. She hadn't actually let him, she'd died and he had no choice. Illium was full of different people, and he'd finally gotten a taste of the galaxy when he'd boarded the Normandy.

Tarek went to knock, but he heard a sound from the room. He listened for a moment and heard a laugh and different types of strange noises.. His eyes widened and he stepped away from the door as it opened Tarek ran away and hid in the kitchen. He heard footsteps and saw the thing called Javik and the blue Asari named Liara emerge from around the corner. He sucked in a breath when they passed by.

He silently watched them disappear toward the elevator. Tarek sighed. That had been too close! He was about to stand up when, "What are you doing?" Tarek jumped and looked behind him. A... human? He was in a uniform and had crossed arms. A stern, but playful look on his features. "Uhh... who are you?" The man chuckled at the boy's hesitance. "I'm Alenko, Kaiden Alenko, and you are?"

Tarek stood up. The man was only an inch taller than him and had chocolate-brown eyes. Tarek pointed a talon at himself and looked around. "Me?" Alenko nodded. "Yeah, you!" "Oh." Tarek shifted on his feet and looked around again. "I'm Tarek.. Tarek Lynxsus." "Lynxsus? Hmm, so Garrus finally found some kid to drag along and do his chores, huh?" "Actually, sir," Tarek cut in quickly, "I wanted to come along."

Kaiden paused and his eyes stayed on Tarek. "Uhh, right." He looked around for a quick second. "So, where are your parents." "Dead." Tarek remarked and Kaiden nodded solemnly. "Oh, sorry. I didn't think about.-" "It's okay." There was a long silence between them and Kaiden yawned.

Stretching he groaned. "Well, I have to get back to work. I'll see you around." Kaiden passed Tarek and headed toward the elevator. Tarek watched after him and suddenly had the urge to explore the ship while he wasn't being under surveillance.

He strode toward the med bay and peeked in through the window. His green eyes hovered over the white walls, and various vials of liquid, and tiny computer chips. He lost interest and headed toward the crew quarters and observation deck. He found the men's restroom and decided to go before he did anymore exploring.

After he relieved himself, Tarek went on to Life support and the starboard observation deck. In every room there was not one soul. It was quiet and the only sound that could be heard was the ship's engine and the occasional crackle and spark of clashing wires hanging from the walls and ceiling.

He sat down in one of the chairs in the mess hall and leaned on the table. He looked around and his eye caught a door that he hadn't inspected before. It was a door at the end of a hall way. He was sure it was the main battery, but he had to see for himself. Tarek slid out of his seat and went to enter the door. It was quite dark in the hall that didn't seem to have many lights working.

It was eerie and strange. When the door opened a hot gust of air blew over him. It reminded him of Palaven's hot dry air. He slowly stepped inside and looked about him. He noted a crate theat was in the middle of the floor and various datapads spread on a crate. He looked toward the terminal and oer to a map that had red dots on certain systems and planets.

He looked below and saw a datapad that had a list of planets and systems on it. Names of.. hospitals?

'Red Tide General Hospital', 'Illucotse GGP Hospital', 'Alli's pediatric center', these hospitals and more, doted various places on the digitalized, blue map.

It would take them months to find the woman Garrus was looking for if she was in one of these hospitals. Some are galactic miles away and the relays were down. It would be months maybe years to visit each hospital individually.

Tarek looked up and walked toward the terminal he noticed a digital frame standing on the terminal in the middle of the two large orange screens. He looked closer and saw it was a photo of Garrus and a human woman. The woman had medium length hair that was black and had a tinge of dark red in it. She had dark blue eyes and were icy blue near the pupil.

She was smiling widely and Garrus was also doing so while holding her shoulder and seemed to be taking the picture. Tarek picked up the frame and examined it a bit closer. The woman was wearing a sweatshirt and Garrus was wearing his casuals.

Tarek guessed that this was the woman Garrus was talking about? Had Garrus really meant a Human woman? Thoughts raced in his mind as he put down the photo and glanced around the room. He looked to his right where he saw a work bench, there he saw another frame with a photo in it. He reached over the scattered gun pieces and wires to pick up the frame.

This photo was of another woman. This time she was saluting and was in formal commander wear. Hat in all. She had a stern look on her face and her hair was short and cupped around her face. Tarek became confused and went to pick up the other photo.

He began to compare the two and notice differences and similarities. In the photo with the lone woman her hair is short. In the one with Garrus her hair was a little past her shoulders. Can human hair be cut? Or is it a different woman. He compared the pictures again, but to facial features. They were the same. Tarek was about to put the photos back when a gruff voice startled him.

"What are you doing in here?" Tarek turned to see the blue Asari, Liara, standing in the doorway. Her face was sincere, but she looked a bit strict and terrifying in the dim light. "I was just-" Tarek set the photos down and Liara walked up to him. Garrus hasn't told you where we're going yet had he?" Tarek shook his head and stepped in front of the photos.

"Those photos are special to Officer Vakarian. You would be better off not to touch them." Liara went to look at the datapad near the map. Tarek turned to the photos again and picked up the one with Garrus and the woman. "This woman. Who is she?" Liara looked up from the datapad and set it down before walking over to Tarek.

"She was a great leader. You haven't heard of her before?" "No, ma'am." Liara smiled slightly and looked at Tarek. "This is the Commander of this ship. Commander Shepard." "Commander Shepard?" Liara nodded. "Her you've heard of?" Tarek nodded and the realization came to him.

"I never knew. I knew Garrus had a relationship with a woman, well, the woman he's trying to find. And I knew he worked with Commander Shepard, but I never thought in Spirit's name that those two would be the same woman." Tarek became confused.

Why had Garrus loved this Human so much? Why hadn't he found a Turian woman on Palaven or somewhere else? Tarek wasn't trying to be racial or racist. He just didn't understand. Why a Human?

"Are you confused?" Liara must have noticed his distress. "I don't understand. Why does he love her?" Liara chuckled. "Have you ever met the Commander? Anyone and everyone that she met she charmed. She's kind and compassionate. She knows how to fight. She's funny, smart and generous."

"I think if you had met her you would have liked her too." Liara added, "but I think you might have to ask Garrus that." She smiled and walked out of the main battery. Being careful of the photos, Tarek quickly set them in their original place and ran to follow Liara.


	2. Chapter 2

Story~ Belongs to me  
Background~ My view of after Mass Effect 3, Garrus and Shepard pairing.  
Disclaimer~ I own the added storyline at the end of Mass Effect 3  
NOTE: Some flashbacks take place in the Mass Effect games. BIOWARE owns this Mass GALAXY, except my Shepard and any additional characters that you do not see in the Mass Effect Games.

These ~~~ are beginnings and at ends of flashbacks

NONPROFIT~ This is just for fun. ^^

~Love is All We Have Left~

CHAPTER 2 ~ Lost and Found

"You don't keep any records?" Garrus was at the end of his patience. They'd been to planets in the outer rim and hospitals on Earth. Garrus was told that many injured and fatally injured soldiers and civilians were turned away when a hospital got full. Almost every hospital they visited was completely full.

It was frustrating to no end. Trying to find a hospital in Thessia with Humans or races other than Asari in them, was extremely rare. In Garrus' opinion it was worth a try. They were now in Illium trying to find some sort of evidence maybe if she's here or was at one point. "No, I'm sorry, sir. We don't usually keep records, but I can admit you to one of the ER doctors if you are in a hurry." "I'm not here to be treated. I'm looking for someone."

"I see." The woman nodded and pulled out a bunch of datapads. "I can do one thing." The woman whispered in a hushed tone. "I can give you lists of doctors who've dealt with more traumatized patients. The most injured patients are sent to the DT ward, but that is all I can do." She handed Garrus a datapad and he thanked the nurse and turned to Tarek.

"So, what do we do now?" Tarek asked as he looked around the small and heavily crowded hospital.

Garrus sighed and shrugged. "I suppose we'll start looking." He looked around and down at the datapad. "Well, the first doctor on the list is.. hm.. Dr. Palma Sunri." Tarek nodded and they headed to room 298 where the Dr. was supposedly located.

It took them 30 minutes just to find the room on the second floor. They entered a small room and saw a couple of beds and various boxes of medical supplies. There was a couple of people in the room. A doctor was sitting on a chair and a patient seemed to be asking questions to the doctor. The patient in the other bed seemed to be asleep or in a coma.

The doctor nodded a couple of times and mumbled to the patient. She got up and moved toward the two Turians. The Asari was a dark purple and had beautiful vibrant blue markings. "How can I help you two?" The woman gripped her white coat pockets and smiled slightly. "I have patients, calls, and medical forms to tend to so-" "This won't take very much time. I'm just looking for someone."

The Asari's small smile faded a bit. "I'm sorry, but with this hospital being so full and big, I don't know if you'll ever find the person your looking for. It's actually a 1 out of a thousand chance." Garrus nodded, "I know, but I'm not concerned about the odds. I would like to know if you've ever had a woman patient that had dark red hair. Err, some scars on her cheeks and one on her lip and across an eyebrow? A tattoo of some black markings on her back?"

The Asari's eyebrows were strained as her eyes darted around, trying to remember such a woman. "Um, I did see my sister working with someone of that description. I would try asking her about her.  
My sister is a nurse named Owena. She can probably help you more than I could. You can probably find her in room 237."

Garrus nodded his thanks and pulled Tarek along the hallway. Garrus and Tarek were starting to feel overwhelmed with the smell of anesthetics. Everything antibacterial made their noses twitch in disgust. Garrus was actually starting to hate hospitals.

They continued to wander until they found room 237. Garrus foolishly hoped that he would walk in and see Kiana in a bed, but his hopes faded when he only saw an empty room, and an Asari woman in the back of the room cleaning. Garrus knocked lightly and stepped in the room.

"Excuse me." The Asari stood up. There was a surprised look on her face. "Hello, can I help you boys?" She was an older Asari. She looked like she hadn't slept in days. "Yes, your sister.. eermm." Garrus searched his mind for the name, but Tarek elbowed him and whispered, "Palma, Palma." Garrus elbowed Tarek harder without looking and Tarek gave a little, "Oof." and Garrus spoke up again quickly. "Palma." The Asari grinned and nodded. "My sister?" It stayed silent for a while until Owena jabbed at them. "Don't you boys need something? Why are you standing there like you are stuck?"

Garrus shook his head. "Yeah, errmm, your sister, Palma said that you were working on a patient I know." Owena raised an eyebrow and sank into a hip. "Alright, I've worked on many patients, but I'm afraid I don't know 'which' one you know."

"Right," Garrus chuckled, "Yeah..." Garrus went on and explained Kiana's appearance in detail. A small light sparked in Garrus' chest when Owena said, "Oh, yes! Luna." "Luna?" Garrus squeaked and followed Owena to one of the large windows in the room. She looked up and seemed to scan the sky.

"Yes, when never got her real name, but every night when she was 'awake' she would have us put her bed down far enough so she could see the stars threw the window. The officer that watched over her called her that. She wouldn't speak when she was awake. That's why we had to make a name for her."

Garrus nodded and Owena looked at him and scanned his profile. "But why are you looking for her? Do you know who she really is?" Garrus glanced outside. He sighed and his eyes ran over the hover cars flying by the window and the light glow of the sunset over the horizon.

"I hope so." He muttered to himself. "Well, I have business and patients to tend to so if you wouldn't mind." Garrus snapped out of his trance and turned to Owena who was now at the door. "Do you know where she is?" Owena flicked her finger across her datapad screen and looked up. "She was transferred to Mindoir's First Aid Hospital about... 2 months ago. Oh, and before you leave. This woman was transferred here from a medical tent on Earth in London. It may or not be your woman, but in any case. I hope you find her."

The woman smiled brightly with a reassuring twinkle in her eye when she left. It fell silent in the white room that was now glowing with the vibes of orange and red from the sunset. "So, now what?" Tarek asked and stood beside Garrus who was staring out the window.

"We're going to Mindoir."

MINDOIR

The Normandy arrived in Mindoir determined. The ship seemed to buzz and hum with energy. Garrus hadn't slept a wink since Illium. He couldn't believe they had a trail on her. They had a lead. Liara grabbed Garrus' arm before he exited the ship. "Garrus, shouldn't you shower or eat something before you leave? I know how anxious you are, but leaving yourself unattended for so long?" Garrus didn't feel like he had time for Liara's motherly lectures. She had a point, but he felt like he couldn't spare another minute.

"I will when I get back." He said simply and quickly hopped into the hover car before Tarek had a chance to hop in and before Liara could reprimand him again. Garrus could feel his chest heaving up and down with anxiety as he drove the hover car to his destination. Mindoir's First Aid Hospital was said to be the planet's first hospital and was established over 50 years ago.

He stopped in front of a relatively large building that had looked like it had been run through barbwire. It looked fairly stable and seemed to be alive on the inside. Mindoir hadn't been hit by reapers as bad as some planets had. Unlike Illium, Mindoir doesn't have as much inhabitants. It almost looked as if the specific city he was in recovered fairly quickly.

He got out of the hover car and glanced around at the piece of history that seemed untouched. Mindoir was a human colony that grew into separate cities over time. The buildings were made from bricks and the grass was a vibrant green.

He looked at the hospital and with no hesitation, he walked in. The instant smell of antiseptic filled his nose. He glanced around the calm seating area and walked up to the front desk. This time Garrus asked for a 'Luna' that was transferred from Illium. The desk woman smiled and nodded.

"She visits here often. She has her regular check ups. Is there a reason you are looking for her?"  
Garrus' chest started pounding. "Yes, do you know where I can find her?" The human woman suddenly became a uneasy. "Are you just visiting her? It's not uncommon someone comes looking for a patient, but Luna is an innocent and sweet woman. Are you here because she did something wrong?"

Garrus sighed. He hadn't bothered to change into civilian clothing and still had on his armor that wasn't in great shape. "No, I'm not here to hurt her. I'm just a friend who's been looking for her." The woman nodded. "Well, in that case. She's living in a metal home right off of Wicker Street in Fawndoe Community. It's a housing area. The home is a large two story brick house. There is a sign that says 'Doe Mental Home'. It's quite easy to spot."

Garrus thanked the woman and proceeded to his next destination in the hover car. He radioed Joker to give him the location of this Mental Home. Once he got the directions from where he was, he set off to find his lost human being.

LUNA

The little woman with the dark red hair flicked her fingers along the piano keys. She had natural talent for the instrument.  
She had been taught what keys were which and she quickly picked out songs that she knew.  
In the short time that she'd stayed at the home she'd learned to play piano and the violin.  
Although, the first day she found herself in the home she wanted to get out.  
She knew she had nowhere else to go, but she felt like a black sheep in the large house.  
After she was finished with her song a knock rattled the door. She stood up, and waited for madam Ellena to open the front door.

Madam Ellena was an Asari. She had vibrant blue skin and a complexion of a woman in her early 20's for a human, but in her old 213's she was almost a matriarch. "Luna, why don't you open the door?" Luna, the little woman with dark red hair, shook her head and stepped behind Ellena.

Ellena opened the door and revealed someone Luna had only dreamt about. The tall Turian in burly armor looked like he'd just come from battle. His face was contorted into an astonished look that made his mandibles spread wide his mouth open slightly, and his brow plates raise as high as they would go.

Luna's eyes also widened in astonishment. Without a further thought. Luna backed up and scurried up the stairs to her room and shut the door behind her. She sank to the floor and questions that she couldn't answer ran through her mind.

(If you're confused about who Luna is.. Lets just say that she's Shepard)

GARRUS

Garrus' heart sped when he saw the little red headed woman with scars on her little face and her bright blue eyes that didn't seem bright with life.

He watched the love of his life start to run. He unconsciously braced an arm on the door and stepped forward. The silence after he heard a door shut was threatening.

"I suppose you know that woman." Ellena mused and opened the door to him. "Why don't you come in and we can talk?"

Garrus took up the offer with a heavy heart and stepped in the large entry way. "She's been here for months. I knew she was different when she stepped in my house. Excuse me." Ellena lead him to a living area and sat down on a couch.

Ellena sat in a recliner across from him. "Why are you here, exactly? Perhaps, you know who this woman was before she was found?"

Garrus needed answers before he just gave away his information. "How, when, and who found her?" Garrus asked all at the same time. He sat hunched over his legs. Tense as he was, he wasn't just going to relax in this situation.

Ellena sat back and crossed her arms over her chest. "Well, there was a soldier named Jackson Curtis. He was the one who.. 'Found' her. Jackson and another soldier were scanning the streets of London on Earth.

They came to a stop on their scan when they saw a woman who was barely alive, dragging herself across the street. When they got out of their vehicle she dropped to the ground and went unconscious.

From there she was sent to a hospital there in London. The doctors said she was near the brink of death, but clinging to dear life. All they could do for her was rip off the rest of the armor that had melted to her skin and give her blood until she was sent to a bigger hospital.

From there she was sent to a bigger hospital in the US on Earth. She stayed there for a good two months until she was well enough to be transferred to Illium. There she stayed in two different hospitals for five months. Then she was moved here on Mindoir soil, to the first aid hospital.

She stayed there for five more months and then came to my home. She's been here for two months. What else do you need to know?"

Garrus nodded, but he was ashamed that he hadn't been the one to find her. But really, he had. He just hadn't been the first. "How badly was she wounded?" Ellena winced. "She was bad. Most of her body was bruised and bloody, she lost a finger on her left hand and has a brace on her right leg to help her mobility."

Garrus shook his head. All of that pain that she had to endure... "Now, who are you?" Ellena asked sternly and stood up when Garrus did. "I'm Garrus Vakarian. I'm here to find Kiana Shepard, Commander of the SSV Normandy."

Ellena's mouth gaped. "So, you're looking for Commander Shepard. Well, I guarantee you she's not here,"  
Ellena paused and stared at Garrus. "Wait, do you think-" She put her chin in her hand. "You think Luna is Shepard? I've never seen Shepard, but I've heard a lot about her. Did you know Shepard personally?"

Garrus looked out the large window that overlooked a part of the neighborhood. The sun was setting and he realized he doesn't have a lot of day light to kill. "That woman.. She's Kiana. I know she is. Why is she here? In a mental hospital of all places?"

"She won't speak," Ellena quickly put in. "I took her in when no one knew what to do with her after she recovered. She had nothing. She wouldn't communicate and still won't. She doesn't smile. The poor thing is like a doll with only one expression."

A click of a door knob and a squeak of hinges interrupted the talk. They both looked toward the front door and watched a human man come in. "Ah, Curt." Ellena said as she looked the man over. Jackson Curtis was dressed in soldier attire, his stature was maybe an inch or two shorter than Garrus. He was slim, but had some muscle on him. His short auburn hair was slicked up and his emerald green eyes glared in the light.

Garrus looked over him continually. So this is the man that saved Kiana. His main question was why he's here and not in London? "Who's this?" Curt asked as he poked a pinky at Garrus and drank from a water bottle in his hand. Dropping his pack to the floor and walking toward them.

Ellena shifted uneasily and sat down. "Mr. Vakarian this is Jackson .A. Curtis. Jack, this is Garrus Vakarian." Curt nodded, "Yeah I've heard of you. You were in London during the last assault. Tell me," Curt crushed his empty plastic water bottle and slammed it on a nearby table. "Where did you disappear to? Hm?"

Garrus clenched his jaw. He already didn't like this guy. "Enough, Jackson! Lets not go there!" Ellena pulled at his arm. Curt continued to glare at Garrus, "Where's Luna?" Ellena glanced at Garrus and set her mother mask on. "Upstairs." Curt didn't reply and walked up the stairs still fuming.

"Excuse him. He's had a rough time at work. He's stressed." Ellena ran two fingers across her forehead. "Why is Curtis still here?" Garrus asked as he sat down again.

"He's taken care of Luna for more than a year. He followed her to whatever hospital she was transported to. He nursed her more than any doctor in the hospitals did. Or so I hear."

Garrus ground his teeth in his mouth quietly. "It's getting late do you have a place to stay the night, officer?" Garrus nodded. "I have a ship about an hour or so out. I have to go. Thank you for having me." Garrus stood up and was making his way to the door when Ellena stopped him.

"That won't do." She clicked her tongue in disgust. "That's too far. It'll be dark before you get there. We have bandits and gangs that roam the streets in the dark. You'd be better off staying here for the night."

Garrus was a trained soldier. He could probably take a small gang, but would it really be worth leaving Kiana when he'd just found her?

Without another doubt he nodded to Ellena and followed her to the guest bedroom, it was more of a closet. It had a good sized twin bed in it, but it didn't have a window and wasn't very roomy, but he couldn't complain.

Lying down on the firm mattress after he'd taken his armor off, he felt like he couldn't wait to see Kiana. Lying in the bed he turned. he was in the same house with her... His blood was pumping and he felt like there was no better opportunity. More like he couldn't help himself.

He got off of the bed and quietly walked up the large staircase. He glanced from door to door. He then realized it might be a little harder than he thought. The doors were the same size and they all seemed the same.

Garrus crossed his arms and walked down a hall. He didn't see anything significant there. Then he trudged down another long hall and his eye caught something rather unusual. This door to a room he was looking at had a light shining under the door,

The door knob had a star wooden star hanging by a ribbon. It was painted a soft yellow color and read, 'LUNA'.

Bingo. Garrus grabbed the door knob, but something told him to knock first. After he knocked he heard the pitter-patter of feet on the other side of the door.

The click of the door knob made Garrus' chest pound. He took a step back and saw the door slowly open to reveal half of the young woman's face. The light from inside the room flooded into the dark hallway.

She looked up at the Turian with one eye peaking through the door that she had opened just a crack. Garrus wanted to say something, but words wouldn't form in his mind.

Luna stared at him until she quickly closed the door. Garrus heard the snap of a lock being put in place behind the door. Fairly quickly, his stomach jumped into his throat. The hallway became dark again and Garrus had been left in it.

What is wrong with her?

LUNA

She closed the door and stood with her back pressed against it.  
She couldn't get the memories to spring across her mind.

She slid down to the floor and furrowed her brow. Something about this didn't rub her the right way. Getting up, she went to the desk where she kept most of her things.

After rummaging she found the little holo frame and switched it on. She braced herself as a photo flickered on. A crack in the screen had crept across an edge of the frame. She stared at the photo for a hard moment.

The photo was of a woman and a Turian. The woman was Luna. She knew that, but what she didn't know was who the Turian is. She stared at the face until her head hurt. The blue markings on his face were also on hers in the photo.

It was a sweet picture she had to admit. He looked like he was taking the picture and she was signing peace with one of her hands. The two of them were close together and she was leaning on the Turian.

He had a smile, as she did and they both looked happy. Was this woman really Luna? Luna shook her head at the thought and went to her mirror hanging on the wall.

She glanced at herself and then at the holo. She continued until she felt satisfied. She attempted to do the pose that the woman was doing in the holo. It matched, but as Luna lifted her hand to do the peace sign she glanced at her missing limb.

Of course she never remembered how it felt to have a middle finger on her left hand. She hadn't minded it.. Until now. She gave up and stared at the holo a bit more.

Does this Turian know her and was trying to find her? Now that he's found her, what's he going to do? Take her away? Luna shifted uncomfortably and sat on the edge of her bed.

As she stared she noticed something she hadn't looked close enough at before. Between two cracks were the hands of the two of them. They were clasped together.

Luna's eyes widened a little at the reality. Holding hands? So that means they were close.

For a moment Luna's heart ached because her ability to remember was gone, but also because she felt bad that he was here and she didn't know why.

Was he here to take her back home? But she didn't know where 'home' was. She didn't even know her own name. This Turian could answer all of her questions. If only she would speak..

Luna set the holo down and walked to the mirror. She honestly didn't even know what her own voice sounded like... If she was going to get answers she couldn't just stand there and hope people knew what she was thinking.

She swallowed and felt her throat suddenly become dry. "Who am I?" She said to herself in the mirror. A hand quickly went to her mouth and tears started to sting her eyes. Her heart pounded in her chest as it quickly collapsed.

All of the months of being in hospitals and being housed by other people. Not knowing who she is or where she was. She was more of a lost kitten being taken from place to place with no say because she had no clue who she was or what to do.

Luna put both hands over her mouth as tears started to flow from her wet eyes. She backed up and dropped on the bed like a rock and cried herself to sleep...

GARRUS

Garrus had an early start the next morning. He woke up and peeped out the door and didn't see anyone in the hallway, but saw it was at least morning.

He grabbed his laptop and sat on the couch in the living room. He didn't want to just eat from someone's cabinets without their permission.

It just wasn't him. He wasn't really hungry anyway. He heard doors open and close upstairs. His blood started pumping at the thought of Kiana.. Luna, coming down the stairs.

"She's not the only one who lives upstairs, damn it!" Garrus thought to himself and rubbed his temple.  
It was a few minuets until someone came down the stairs. He knew it wasn't Kiana. He could tell by just listening to the footsteps.

"Good morning, Officer Vakarian." Garrus chuckled while he finished typing. "It's just Garrus." Ellena walked to his side and sighed as she opened the blinds. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to disrespect your position."

She smiled and went into the kitchen. "I'm making a levo and dextro breakfast. I have a hunch that you'd like some?" Ellena called from the kitchen and started pulling stuff from the cabinets.

Garrus thought for a minute. They did have good food on the Normandy. And the crew couldn't stay here forever..  
He closed his laptop and glanced toward the kitchen. "Actually, I have to go to the Normandy to..." He gathered the end of his thoughts and had completely forgotten his manners.

He'd just assumed that this woman would let him stay for a week or so. He walked into the kitchen and stood aside so the busy Asari could work on breakfast for the large household.

He was about to speak up, but she seemed to already know what he wanted. "So, I don't think it would hurt if you stayed with us for a few more days. Or do you have some business elsewhere?"

Garrus wasn't sure how to respond, but he mulled over his words long and hard. "No, ma'am. I would really like to stay here, but my crew can't stay here waiting for me. I'm going to go inform them so that they can leave and help elsewhere while I'm here."

Ellena cracked some eggs into a pot and dropped the shell in the disposal. "I see no problem with that. When are you going?"

"I was thinking about right now. Then I'd be back a little after breakfast, but I wouldn't be intruding on anyone's meal."

A figure walked right in front of Garrus, the dark haired head screamed in his face. How had she? How did he not hear her coming down the stairs? He looked around the corner and up the stairs, but he didn't find an answer.

"Ah! There's my helper!" Ellena exclaimed and handed Kiana, Luna, the bread to toast in the toaster. Garrus glanced at Kiana's face and saw her eyes were puffy and she looked like she hadn't gotten a stitch of sleep.

She had cried. Garrus knew it. That's the way she looks when she cries herself to sleep. He'd endured a night of her suffering before. Though, he knew why she cried back then, but why had she cry last night?

He couldn't get himself to move. He just wanted to stare at her face. Taking in her features. He shifted on his feet and he didn't take notice when Ellena looked at him while she wiped her hands.

Ellena watched the tall Turian in his casuals stare at Luna. A grin spread across her face. It was adorable, Garrus was genuinely in love with this little human. She could see it in his eyes.

Jackson Curtis wasn't going to like him anymore than he already did if he saw Garrus loving on Luna as much as he did.

Ellena turned back to her cooking with a grin on her features. A squeak came from Luna and she was holding her finger index finger on her right hand.

Garrus leaped into action without thinking. He got out of his comfortable leaning-on-the-door frame stance and grabbed her hand that she'd burnt and lead her to the kitchen sink.

LUNA

The searing pain in her finger sent vibes of pain through her hand. It wasn't a serious burn, nor was it just a slight tingle. She felt a body enclose her and hands led her to  
the sink. The taloned hands were warm and surprisingly soft under hers.

She stared at the hands as one held her injured hand and the other turned the faucet on. He held the back of her hand with such care...

Her head slowly turned to look at his face. He didn't look down at her, but she stared up at him. The face that was so familiar yet unfamiliar.

The beautiful icy blue eyes, the blue markings, just.. him.  
The cool water ran over her finger tips. She was so focused on him that she didn't even notice that he was drying her hands.

He didn't look at her, but she watched his eyes flick to her face every once in a while. She looked up at him and faced him as he gently wiped her hands down.

"Thank you." The words found their way to her throat. Garrus looked up. His mandibles were spread wide and the sound of a whisk scraping a bowel stopped abruptly.

Garrus' shocked expression turned into a soft smile as he looked into her eyes. "You're more than welcome." He said softly and put the towel on the counter before he walked out of the room.

Ellena stared at Luna and her mind reeled a little. Luna hadn't spoken before.. So when the small voice spoke her thanks, Ellena's heart jumped to her throat.

Luna continued to stand there. Her hands left floating in the air as she continued to hear that voice in her mind. "You're more than welcome."

A throbbing pain made Luna's hands swing to her head. Her brow furrowed and she shut her eyes tightly as if she could blink away the pain.

She heard the voice that had haunted her since she'd woken up in the hospital bed. It was the husky voice that calmed her when she was distressed. It was the voice that was mysterious before, but now a light of clarity shown on it.

"Kiana.. Kiana." It spoke, the name that was foreign to her ears, but she knew it called her. "Kiana!" She shook her head as a memory flashed through her mind...

~Memory~  
June 25th 2186

"Close your eyes!" "I have them closed!" "No peeking." "I won't peek!" Some hands led Kiana somewhere Garrus had wanted to come. It was on the Citadel and was 'restricted' by the regulations, but Garrus had blind folded her and held her hands as he led.

"Can I take this thing off now?" She asked as she gently tugged at her hands. A cool breeze whipped through her hair and the sound of hover cars and wind could only be heard.

Garrus let go of her hands and Kiana reached up to pull the fold off, but a voice snapped at her. "You do that and your life won't be so great for the next few minutes." "Garrus, how long is this gonna take?" The Commander hissed impatiently.

"If I had remembered how impatient you are I would have done this a bit differently." "You don't say?" Kiana said as she shivered as the crisp wind nipped at her ears, nose, and lips.

"Okay, ready?" She felt talons gently pull off the piece of cloth and the bright artificial sun stung her eyes as they adjusted. "Wow." Was all that came from her lips as she took a step forward and looked around.

"I would have lied if I didn't want it to inspire a certain... Hhm, mood." Kiana kept a straight face and turned to look at him. "You could have picked a warmer spot." "You're an ass." Kiana chuckled.

"How-" "Don't even ask." She chuckled some more and stepped toward Garrus. "This is sweet, Garrus." He looked down and shook his head. "No, I watched vid after vid.. A couple of them said this would happen. Ahh, I'm such an idiot." He placed a hand on his temple. He felt arms wrap around him and he opened his eyes to see Shepard looking up at him.

"No, I love it." The smile on her face was contagious. His face showed a bit of shock as he looked down at her. "Really?" "Really."  
She smiled a bit wider and he bent down...

~~~~

Luna felt a bit dizzy as she came back to her senses. Little did she know that Ellena had been calling her as she had went into her... Memory? Without another thought Luna quickly grabbed her leather jacket and ran outside with Ellena calling after her...

GARRUS

Garrus returned to the Normandy and in no time he was entering as the cargo opened to reveal Tarek running down the cargo bay toward him.

"GARRUS." He halted in front if the elder Turian and huffed and puffed. "Where were you all night? We thought you'd been captured or something." Garrus shook his head and smiled.

"I'm fine." Tarek raised his brow plates. That was the first time Tarek had ever seen Vakarian smile. "What's wrong?" Tarek asked and Garrus' smile just widened. "Nothing."

Tarek grinned a little. "You found her?" Liara and Javik emerged from the elevator and made their way toward them. "Garrus!" Liara ran to Garrus and threw her arms around him,  
only to quickly step back and look at him seriously.

"Where were you?" Garrus put his hands up in defense. "Whoa, whoa. Calm down. I found her."  
Liara's eyes wide and she put a hand to her mouth in shock. "You did?" Garrus nodded. "I'm staying here for sometime. I know you guys don't want to sit around. So, I came to let you know that you should leave and go find a planet that could use your help.

Liara looked like she'd been slapped. "You're not just going to bring her back here?" Garrus walked passed her, but stopped to answer the question. "No, she's not really Commander Shepard right now, Liara."

Garrus gathered some smaller weapons and packed his favorite sniper that Kiana had given to him. He ran a hand over the metal and stuck it gently in the case and put it in a bag. He then picked up a data pad that he'd managed to fix and put some articles on.

"Excited to get back, hhmm?" The buzzing voice of a giant bug startled him out of his thoughts. "You could knock." Garrus puffed and picked up the photo of Kiana and also packed it.

"That would be too polite. Besides, I would lose my touch."  
Garrus scoffed at Javik and checked his messages. 5 calls from an unknown caller. "Someone's been wanting to talk to you. They wouldn't talk to us.

They only wanted you alone." Javik was leaning on the door frame when Garrus turned around to head to the war room. "Joker-" "Already on it." A voice replied over the comm.

Garrus grabbed his bag and headed to the war room alone. When the door closed and it was just him and the circular terminal in the large room, the beeping of an incoming call blinked and beeped with a little red dot light.

He set his bag down and accepted the call. He remembered that this is the room where Kiana stood when she talked to Anderson.. He shook off the thought and focused on a blue figure that generated in front of him.

"It's about time." A human woman showed up in front of him. She had somewhat familiar features and long hair that draped over her shoulders. He didn't know this woman, but he had a feeling that she knew exactly who he was.

"The great Garrus Vakarian. How do I start this off?" The woman was speaking in a tone that sounded stuck up, spoiled brat-like.

It wasn't a wise way to speak to Garrus when he wasn't necessarily in a good mood. "What do you want?" The woman smiled devilishly. "Oh, it's not what I want. It's what you want." The woman said as she walked slowly from left to right.

"Your love has forgotten you. The only woman you ever loved- forgot.." Garrus' jaw clenched a little tighter. "What did you do to her?" He snarled from behind his teeth.

"Oh, that's not important at the moment. What's important is that you leave Mindoir.." Garrus, confused as he was, wasn't confused by this statement. "Go to hell. Why should I take orders from you? Who are you?"

The woman laughed and flipped her long dark hair over her shoulder. "I thought you would be this way. First of all, who I am is not important. Two, you might as well listen. You see. I put Kiana here for a reason. She has started a new life! She doesn't need you anymore. So, get off of Mindoir or my friends in high places will hound you down." A glint of frustration flashed in Garrus' eyes "You have one week."

The transmission flickered off and the woman with it. Garrus started to wonder who that woman was... More over, what she'd done to Kiana.

LUNA

She shivered and wrapped herself tighter into her jacket. The ridged and crisp wind made her nose twitch and burn a bright red. It was a very cool day. The sun wasn't out and light gray clouds were a blanket over the sky. She sat on the bench and fiddled with her cold fingers.

This was the place she could think. It was the place to come when she felt like she couldn't think or comprehend something. Lately, she felt as if her life had started when she woke up in a hospital bed..

No childhood, no life before the hospital. Her world and life felt upside down and cut in half. She'd always came to this bench by the lake to think.

"I thought I'd find you here." She'd been so deep in thought that she hadn't heard Jackson come over and sit next to her. "That Turian left, luckily. He-" "He left?" Luna interrupted and had a worried look on her face. Her eyes stared into his.

Jackson was curious.. This was the first time he'd heard her speak. "Yeah, why?" Luna looked down at her toes and went silent. "Luna." She continued to space and didn't answer him.

A surprised gasp flew out of Luna's mouth when he turned her chin toward him. "Luna, why do you care about him?" Her eyes wavered and she bit her lip.

"He's not someone you know." Luna pulled her chin from his hand and looked away. He already knew what she was thinking. He knew what was slowly crumpling her heart... How?

"Luna.." Jackson scooted toward her and wrapped his arms around her. She became tense, but relaxed a bit. "He's gone. Maybe it's better that you don't know the old you." She leaned into him.

His muscular arms felt comfortable. She wrapped her arms around one of his as she stared off into the distance...  
Something had always been fishy about Jackson..

Then she felt a hook suddenly tug at her heart. She released herself from Curtis' arms, stood up and started to run..

GARRUS

Garrus had hopped into the hover car and started back to the house. He spent some time tracking the transmission and the Normandy went off to the location. On his way he wasn't paying much attention to the road until he saw someone walking beside it.

Luna had her tan leather jacket zipped and she was tightly hugging herself to block the cool winds. Her choppy chin length hair blew in the wind. He stopped beside her and got out of the car. Her eyes went wide when she saw him.

There was a twinkle of relief in her stance. When she just stood there He walked up to her. "What are you doing out here?" Luna didn't speak. She was too busy staring at him. "Come on. I'll take you back." He went to get back in the car. He expected her to follow, but she just stood there.

"It's just a hover car." He said as he got out. He put his hands on her shoulders and led her to the passenger side and let her sit. Then they were on their way.

It was a good twenty minute drive/fly back to the house from this spot. He didn't want to ask, but he couldn't figure out why she was so far away and on foot in the cold.

She curled up and started to warm her feet with her hands. Garrus was rather shocked to see her bare feet. Garrus reached in the back, pulled out a blanket and handed it to her.

"Thank you." She mustered softly and got comfortable in the seat. It didn't take but a few minutes for the little woman to fall asleep.

Garrus couldn't help looking at her sleeping features every one in a while. He had missed her face. Looking at her now he realized that she had bags under her eyes.

He hasn't had a good rest for awhile. Last night was alright, but it was restless. When they arrived, Jackson was sitting in the rocking chair on the porch.

He stood up in an outrage and faced Garrus. "What are you doing here? Where's Luna?" Garrus calmly replied, "Didn't expect me to come back?" He didn't answer the other question as he carefully picked up the woman out of the car and started to carry her to the house.

Kiana had always been a hard sleeper. Now was no different, she stirred a little and made herself comfortable in his arms. Jackson scoffed. "You have no business coming back!" He followed Garrus into the house as he continued to speak his mind.

"You have no right to act like you know her. She doesn't even know you." That statement made Garrus stop halfway up the stairs. He turned around and walked down to stand in front of Curtis and get in his face.

"I don't care if she doesn't remember me. I was closer to her than you think I was, and I don't need your objection to make me give up trying to recover her memory." Garrus growled softly and walked back up the stairs and to her room.

He laid her in the bed and went to leave, when he was caught by the arm. "Don't go." Her eyes were mostly closed and her mouth partly open. She stared at him and Garrus' chest started pounding.

He sat down on the bed and stared at her. "Alright, I'm not going anywhere." They both looked at each other for a long time before she closed her eyes and fell back asleep.

Garrus smiled as he watched her sleep. The scars that dotted her face were barely noticeable when she was sleeping. He heard a little noise by the door and saw Ellena standing there. "That is the most relaxed I've ever seen her."

She whispered. A smile was spread on her face as she unfolded her arms and closed the door enough so it was just barely cracked open.

He smiled a bit wider when he noticed that her hand was still on his arm. Her fingers still limply wrapped around his wrist. He leaned down and pressed his lip plates to her forehead.

For a few moments he thought he had his Kiana back, but the moments turned into a couple of hours when she woke. She stared at him as she sat up. The long stare that she gave him, the look that said, "What are you doing here?"

In a couple of moments Garrus was flustered. "I, uh. I'm sorry. I'll go."  
Garrus said awkwardly as he awkwardly stood up from sitting on the bed for three hours.

As she watched him go, deep down inside she was calling to him. She wanted him to come back, but no words would make their way to her lips.

GARRUS

For the next couple of days things were quiet. Every once in a while he would help Luna with something or would talk to her even though she seemed to have nothing to say back.

Garrus was tired. He had decided to take a shower and Ellena volunteered to wash his casuals and he slipped into a t-shirt and some pants that Ellena had custom made for him.

Garrus was sitting in the living room on his laptop when he heard a loud cry of laughter. It was child laughter. He had never heard a child laugh in a very long time.

He makes his way to the front door and opens the it to see a little Asari girl and a little Krogan boy grabbing at Luna's legs. He decided to listen in. "Luna, guess what I did! I caught a butterfly!"

Luna had a small grin on her face. Her eyes were smiling and she nodded to the little girl. "We missed you, Aunt Luna."  
The little Krogan boy looked over at Ellena who was talking to another Asari woman.

Just Garrus' luck, Ellena looked over with a smile and she called him over. Garrus closed the door behind him and started to walk over. He felt eyes on him and looked at Luna. She was staring at him.

Her icy, deep blue irises followed his every move. Garrus' heart thumped in his chest like a drum.  
"Eunice, this is Garrus Vakarian." Ellena gestured to him and turned the other Asari.

"Garrus, this is my sister Eunice," Eunice bowed her head, introducing herself. "I hope my sister has given you proper hospitality. She does have a lot to balance on her shoulders."

Ellena bumped her younger sister with her elbow. "I have been doing as best I can. I do have 15 mental people in my house." Eunice giggled. "I know, sister. I was only teasing."

Garrus looked back at Kiana who was now sitting in the large bench swing on the porch with the two kids. "Who is.." Eunice beet him to his question.

"These are Kiana's favored children. They live at my orphanage down the road. Kiana visits often and made some friends." He turned back to look at Kiana. The little woman had a smile on her face and a bright glint in her eyes.

Garrus watched intently as the children pointed to him. Kiana followed their fingers and their eyes locked. Even though they were yards away, he could here the children saying, "Who's that guy, aunt Luna?" "Isn't that the one in the picture?"

Picture... Picture? Garrus' eyes wandered from the children to Kiana. Kiana's eyes didn't waver from his face. He suddenly found himself unable to take his eyes off of her.

Kiana was the one to break the contact when she looked down at her hands. The kids kept tapping the little woman until she looked up at them and nodded.

Garrus turned to Ellena and she smiled. "Cute, isn't it? I hope that someday she'd at least talk to the children. Usually she likes to nod. Those kids remind me of kittens. When you don't want attention from the kittens they want attention from you."

Garrus wasn't quite sure of what a kitten was, but Kiana had described them to him. She'd said they were furry little balls of cuteness. Garrus looked at the children and back at Kiana.

"Kiana's coming back to the orphanage with me. She needs sometime away from this house." Eunice and Ellena looked at him as if they were looking for a recognition.

"Then I'll go with her." Jackson walked up and Garrus turned to look at the human male. He looked like he just got back from work. "Jack!" Ellena squeaked.

Curtis looked at Garrus and glared at him with a threatening look. "I can go with her to the orphanage and spend the rest of the day with her. Has she had lunch?"

Eunice shook her head slowly. "That won't be needed, sir. I can take Luna to and from the orphanage-" "It's alright. I haven't gotten to spend much time with her anyway."

Eunice backed down and Garrus felt a sort of rage rush through his veins. This guy was worse than Kaiden. Not only that, but he didn't even know this guy. That's what made his chest burn.

Jack went to the swing where Luna was sitting and spoke softly to her as he gently pulled her off of the swing. They walked to Jack's car and the kids followed. Garrus watched Curtis help Luna into the backseat and buckle her in.

He kept a steady expression when she glimpsed at him out of the corner of her eye before Jack closed the door. Gary's was startled out of his trance when he felt a tap on his leg. It was the little Asari girl. She looked up at him with chocolate brown eyes and a large grin on her face.

"Excuse me, sir," The girl said in an innocent squeak. Garrus bent down on a knee to her level. "do you know Luna?" She cocked her head and he looked at the car, then back at the girl. "Yes, but she doesn't know me." The girl squinted at him with a questioning look.

"How can you know her, but she doesn't know you?" He smiled and shrugged. "I guess that is a question I'll find the answer to."

The girl pulled her hand from behind her back and revealed a little flower. It was good size and was a baby pink color. "This is for you. It's from Luna, but don't tell her I told you that." The girl whispered. He took the flower and smiled; before he could say his thanks, the girl skipped off. Her dress blowing in the breeze.

He hasn't realized how... Adorable little girls were until now. He stood up and watched the little Asari climb into the backseat of the car.  
Eunice hugged her sister and shook Garrus's hand. "I'm glad I got to meet you. Don't worry, she's in good hands."

She must have seen his eyes wandering toward the backseat of the hovercraft. He looked at Eunice and nodded. He watched the cars drive/fly away. A pit in his stomach he turned back to the house.

Today was going to be a long day. "How long before they get home exactly?" He asked Ellena and she shrugged. "The times vary sometimes they stay late. Sometimes they don't. I wouldn't worry too much. He's a soldier. He knows what he's doing."

Ellena patted his shoulder and Garrus growled. "That's what I'm afraid of."

LUNA

They drove the twenty minute drive to the orphanage. Luna had done this so many times that she knew the route like the back of her hand, though she probably wouldn't know it backwards or when it was pitch black outside.

She watched out the window as she listened to Aniiela (An-ee-eh-la) chatter about the Turian. The little Asari lived to babble, but her mouth seemed to slow when Luna turned to her. "He said he knows you." Aniiela said and placed her little blue hand on Luna's that laid in her lap.

"Maybe, he can tell you how. Maybe, he can help you talk."  
She said. Her soft little voice sounded like the mew of a kitten. Luna smiled softly at the girl and hugged her. The little Asari giggled.

"So, you agree? I think he's really nice. You should talk to him."  
To Luna all of this was touching her. The day Luna had met Aniiela, the little Asari had wanted to be friends with her.

Talking to her until Luna fell asleep, but the child had always wanted Luna to talk. However, the girl never pushed it too much. Luna grabbed the small hand and encased it in her own. She smiled at the Asari and the girl smiled back.

"Here we are." Jackson stopped the car in the parking lot beside Eunice's car and looked back at the girls. "Do you wanna go in?" Luna nodded. Still grinning. Not showing any teeth though. Just curving her lips.

It wasn't forced. It was rather pretty and Curtis defiantly thought so. He grinned and got out of the car and helped the girls out. The nicely painted light blue building was a great sight to Luna. It broke the cycle of vicious days of doing nothing but thinking.

Here, she could take her mind off of the world for the day. Luna held the little hand in hers when they walked in. The little Krogan named Keog trampled in yelling. The shrill high-pitched yell was more than Luna and the rest of them could handle.

"Keog! Calm down!" Jackson laughed. "Sorry." The Krogan boy sat down next to some other boys at the other end of the room. A couple of kids came up to greet Luna. There were lots of different races in this orphanage.

Human, Turian, Krogan, Asari, Salarian, two Quarians, even a Hanar, resides in this safely kept orphanage. For some strange reason; Luna was attracted to all of them(Not as much the Hanar).

The Quarian sisters, Ray and Raaya, were very special to her. She felt... Close to the girls.. Maybe a little closer than Eunice would want. Luna was almost like a sister or an Aunt to these girls. They are ten.

The Turian boy that she loved with the depths of her inner being was named, Inadeous(In-ay-dis).  
He had bright blue markings on his face that were starting to fade. He was a smart little bit and knew how to make her day. He is seven.

The Salarian that seemed to know everything always lurked by her. His name is, Scamdin(Sam-din) (C is silent). He was 5 and tiny. He was the size of a three year old Human, but seemed to have a brain five times that size.

His head wasn't abnormally large, but this boy was as smart as a wise fifty year old man. She loved how sweet the boy was and how he would intently read a book or datapad while following her.

Of course there were many Asari in this orphanage, but Aniiela was her favorite. The little girl, about nine in Human years, just wanted to be Luna's friend. That's only one reason why Luna loves this girl.

There were more Krogan kids than she could count on one hand. Why there were so many, she would never know...  
Keog reminded her of someone, but to be typical she doesn't know or remember who.

The little Krogan boy of six, ate enough food for all of the orphanage children! He was hyperactive and always ready to play some sort of game and beat his opponent at it. Then he would eat some more.

There were many Humans staying at the orphanage, but Cerah seemed to be her favorite. The dark haired girl was very helpful. When there was a chore to be done, the girl volunteered before the job was even given.

It warmed her heart to know this bright eyed girl. She was at the age of twelve, and Luna got along with her very well.

Throughout the day; Luna had played multiple games with Keog and read books with Scamdin. She'd talked to the Quarian sisters and cuddled with Cerah and Aniiela. Now her day was over, but the thoughts hadn't ended while she was here.

Her mind had constantly brought up Garrus. Her mind constantly switching on to questions and no answers. She hadn't seemed to be able to turn her mind off about that Turian. Maybe, she just couldn't escape the thoughts EVER.

Jackson and Luna got into his car. They were going to head to Ellena's and hit the hay. As the car drove away, children with waving hands stood at the entrance of the orphanage. That was when she realized her day was over.

Back to the grind..

"Luna?" Jackson called. Luna flipped out of her funk and looked at him. "You okay? You look distracted. Thirsty" Luna swished her dry tongue in her mouth and nodded. He handed her a water bottle and drank from it.

Garrus.. Garrus, Garrus, Garrus. How was she...supposed...to  
Luna slowly turned pale. She felt strangely dizzy. The last thing she glanced at was Jackson...  
The strange grin on his face as she fell asleep wasn't very reassuring...

AAAHHH! I'm done! I'm so sorry this chapter took a while. I made it just for y'all of course! It's so nice to get all of this out of my head and onto my journal. I will be writing as much as I can! Thanks guys333

~Kelly


	3. Chapter 3

~Love is All We Have Left~

Story~ Belongs to me

Background~ My view of after Mass Effect 3, Garrus and Shepard pairing.

Disclaimer~ I own the added storyline at the end of Mass Effect 3

NOTE: Some flashbacks take place in the Mass Effect games. BIOWARE owns this Mass GALAXY, except my Shepard and any additional characters that you do not see in the Mass Effect Games.

These ~~~ are beginnings and at ends of flashbacks

NONPROFIT~ This is just for fun. :)

NOTE: I felt like this chapter needed to be first person. So you could get a better feel of the character(s). Sorry for confusing you. I've tried so many styles of writing, but I like first person the best. You get a better feel of the characters. Enjoy~

Chapter 3~

Kiana~ First Person

_I start down a hall and look around. My vision is blurry. Almost like I'd been hit hard up against the head with a brick. All I see is people. Not people with life in their eyes, but people who are cold and lifeless. A chill runs through my spine as I see people that seem familiar, but I'd never seen them before. _

_My head hurts and I press my palms to my temples. Sinking to my knees I scream. The pain is excruciating. The pain vibrates up and down my head and neck. I can't find the strength to stand up and keep going. I've never felt so weak._

"_Your memories will be your down fall, that's why I took them from you. So you could live a life without fear or troubles." _

_A voice that I've heard before, but can't put my finger on, speaks. Someone.. took my memory? The realization hurts. Why would someone hate me so much to take my memories away? I don't even remember what I could have done to make someone hate me... Maybe it's because I survived the war? _

_I'd been told that I was found in some rubble, but I don't know anything more than that. I feel like some thing's being kept from me. Something important. I feel relief from the pain, but my vision is still blurry. The last thing I see is a far too familiar face... lifeless and staring at me.. Garrus. And that's when everything goes dark.~ End of Dream_

My eyes shoot open and all I see is darkness. My thoughts dart to Garrus. I look around and feel strange. My body is throbbing. I'm- in a bed? Lying on my side facing a window. I peer out in front of me and out the large window, there are street lights and stars in the sky. I'm- not at home. I go to get out of the bed, but I lay for a moment.. watching, listening. My senses still drunk with sleep.

I feel the bed move, and the moment I felt like I was alone shattered. How did I not hear someone breathing in the first place? I turn my head very slowly to see someone I never expected to see. Jackson.. Did I.. Did we.. did.. he.. did I?

Oh.. no, no, no. I scramble out of the bed cautiously. I look down at myself and feel a sting of an emotion ravages my chest and mind. I can't explain it. It feels like anger, guilt, and sadness. It feels like a monster. My insides burn and my tender spots feel sore.

Tears burn in my eyes. How did I let this happen? I look around the dim room. My eyes quickly adjusting to the dark. I find my various clothing and slip everything on except my socks, which I couldn't find. I hear a rustle from the bed and a groan. "Kiana?" A groggy voice calls. I've heard that name more than once.

Does Jackson know who I really am too? I shake my head and run through the front door while sliding my sweatshirt on. Breathing heavily to keep the tears away. To keep myself sane. I go as fast as I can down the stairs and to the lobby. Rushing through the lobby entrance. I am outside.. all alone in the night..

I know what has happened. I know I've become a victim.

I don't like that.

Garrus~ Third person

Garrus turns a coaster between his talons over and over.

He'd been waiting for a long while.

Ellena came back a while ago.

Kiana didn't.

It immediately worried him.

Because she was with Jackson.

The man Garrus never liked.

It was dark and wasn't going to get any darker. He knew it was dangerous to go out at night. People that are starving or helpless would do anything to get their hands on something to rob. After the war, people who lost everything went after people who didn't lose a lot. This town was one that hadn't lost much.

Garrus stops turning the coaster in his talons and stands. He couldn't stand waiting any longer. He looked at the clock on the wall. It reads 1:32am. Something was rubbing him the wrong way. Garrus knocks on Ellena's door. He finds a panicked and worried Ellena inside. He asks for Jack's address and she gives it to him willingly without question.

Wherever he lived, Garrus knew that that's where he'd start.

Getting into the hover car and driving to the location, it took a total of 15 minutes to get to the apartment complex, but before he even reached it he saw something that caught his attention. A group of all species of men were clustered around something... or someone.

He parks the car a few yards away. As Garrus approaches, he notices four human men, one with dark skin. And a Turian. All crowded around someone very small. They are laughing darkly and saying things like, "Just rip it off of her. Take 'em off already." Garrus notices a glint of dark hair and blue eyes. That's when his senses explode. He marches over and grabs two of the humans by the back of their necks.

One squeaks and Garrus glares at the other three. The Turian didn't look up. He was grabbing a breast under her shirt and licking Kiana's cheek. That enraged him. Garrus grips the mens' necks tighter and throws their heads toward each other. There is a cry and a thunk. The two men drop to the ground and the Turian looks up with a smirk on his face.

He obviously felt pleasure and power in taking advantage of Kiana. The other two men bolt off and leave the Turian. Garrus grabbed the Turian's arm and went face to face with him. The Turian had white eyes and yellow clan markings. A growl erupts from Garrus's throat. "Let her go." When Garrus's grip tightened on the Turian's arm, the Turian tightened his grip on Kiana. A short scream leaves her throat and Garrus watches her bite her lip. Tears forming in her eyes.

With one swift movement Garrus digs his talon into the Turian's eye and he stumbles back. Grabbing his eye and momentarily letting go of Kiana. Garrus grabs her and slowly leads her to the ground before going back to the Turian. The rage and anger filling him. "So, you are the mate, hhmm? She deserves someone better."

Garrus lunges at the Turian and balls his hand into a fist, connecting it to the Turian's jaw. The Turian doesn't seem to be deterred. He comes back up and grabs Garrus's neck and slams his knee into Garrus's face. Garrus grabs the Turian's waist and flips him over his back. Making him land on the ground behind him with a thud. Garrus takes his pistol out a points it at the Turian.

The Turian smirks. "Go ahead. Shoot me." Garrus frowns and walks up to the Turian. He slams the the heel of his boot into the Turian's abdomen making the Turian curl in pain. "Get out of here, before I do shoot you." The Turian gets up with one hand on his abdomen and one over his eye. Glaring over his shoulder at Garrus as he fades into the darkness.

Garrus looks around for Kiana. He's about to call her name, but corrects himself. "Luna?!" "I'm here." A small reply coming from the wall of a building. She's crouched down cuddling her legs to her chest, tears streaming down her face.

Garrus bends down and sweeps her off of the ground in one swift movement. She curls up in his arms. Clutching his collar with tears continually streaming silently from her eyes.

Kiana~ First Person

I walk down the sidewalk, silently. I don't mind the night, in fact I like it. I just don't like the idea of being out in it. I keep walking until I hear something. Footsteps from behind me. I look to see a man. Scruffy with tattoos decorating his arms. I stand still. His looks are intimidating, but honestly, I know that you can't judge a book by it's cover.

The guy keeps walking forward, but I don't move. He smirks at me. "Well, aren't you cute." The word 'cute' makes me angry. Never in my life have I ever liked being called cute. I don't speak, but I glare. He chuckles and his smirk widens. "You are even cuter when you look angry." He continues walking toward me until he's a couple inches from my face. He's taller than me by quite a few inches.

I put my chin up. "What do you want?" The guy grabs a small fistful of my chin-length hair and breathes into it. "Isn't it kind of obvious?" I push myself away from him and turn around to keep walking. There's a slight problem with that. When I turn around I run into a Turian.

He's in a tank top-ish shirt that shows his arms. It also doesn't make me feel comfortable when he grabs my arm. I tug at my arm and struggle, but once I'm almost free his talons dig into my arm, making me wince. I watch as three more guys, humans, advance. One has dark skin, one is in a red shirt, and one with dark hair and a lip ring. Garrus.. I need him

The guy with the tattoo and the Turian seem to be the leaders. I wish I had some sort of defense in these situations. Now I feel helpless and I can't do anything to save myself. I hate the feeling of not being able, I have to rely on someone or something else to save me.

A sob chokes my throat when the Turian lifts my chin with his talon. A grumble rises in his chest. It was more of a satisfied moan. "You have a mate? Whoever it was gave you a good bond mark." … What? A bond mark. I've seen it on my shoulder/neck, but I never thought much about it. Now that I think about it, it does look like a bite mark.

I...I'm mated with someone? Whom? My mind still swirling about the mark, the Turian grazes his teeth against my neck and I pull back. "Stop it." I hiss. "What is a bond mark?"

It can't hurt to ask.. The Turian looks at me and grins. "Got laid and you don't even know who your mate is? Sad." I growl and clench my fist. "I asked you a question." I glare and he shakes his head. "A bond mark is a symbol of union between two people. Obviously one being Turian. Usually the females receive bond marks. Telling other males that one is his, but since you don't know who your bond mate is-"

He grabs my chin, making me look at him straight in the eyes. " this is an exception." He inches his hand up my waist and I try to pull away, but the other guys hold me still and they breathe on me also. Making me uncomfortably warm. Garrus... I struggle, but with all of them holding me I can't even move my upper body. I kick their legs, but a couple of the guys grab a hold of my legs and hold them in place.

I squeal and shake around, but a hand covers my mouth. It smells smoky like a cigarette. Garrus... The Turian continues to sneak his hand up my shirt and one of the other guys rub around my thighs. Tears burn in my eyes, but I hold them back. I can't seem weak to them.

In the midst of all of this I feel weak. I feel terrible. A pain inches in my core and I feel pure pain. It crawls to my chest and my eyes. It's anger, and helplessness eating me away like acid in my blood.

In all of my moping I feel like I'm being released. My arms are released and not too long after that my legs, but my torso and head aren't freed. Not yet. I close my eyes and open them to see... The one I keep thinking about. His face is plastered with anger and sympathy. The tears finally begin to flow when the Turian digs his talons into the mound that he has a grip on.

I let a scream out, but bite my lip quickly to suppress it. Pain rips through my chest. I'm let go of and a gentle touch leads me to the ground. Garrus..

I crawl to the building and sit against it. Letting the tears streak my cheeks. Garrus.

I hear the Turian hiss something through his teeth. "So, you are the mate, hhmm?" My heart pumps faster. Something told me that I had a connection to him. Whether it was emotional, physical, or spiritually. I just knew there was something about him that I couldn't shake off.

I hear a thud and a wheeze. Garrus growls something, but I wasn't listening. I was just thinking about how I have to be strong in moments like these, but I feel like the monster is making it's way out of me. The tears continue to wet my cheeks and I can't stop them.

Garrus calls me and I breathe to make sure my voice is steady. "I'm here." I say and the next thing I know is warmth and comfort. Even though Garrus may be a Turian, hard and plated, he sure is comfortable to be held by. I feel a surge of want. I want to be held by him.

I want to be in his warmth. I want to be in his presence.

I want him.

I need him.

Then the realization makes the tears pour from my eyes.

I don't remember who we were.

Garrus~ First Person

Of course I was angry.

Anyone who touches Kiana and basically spits in my face and smiles while doing it gets their asses kicked.

I could only imagine how she feels. Helpless and defenseless. I will always be on her six, but when I'm not around she has to defend herself. She was just gained on by 5 men and I wasn't there fast enough before they got to her. I look down at her in my arms. She's crying. I've seen her cry before, but not like this. This is all of her pain and stress flowing in one movement.

I don't blame her for crying, but it always pains me to see her in this state. She has a t-shirt on and no bra. Her feet are bare in her sneakers and her sweatpants loosely hold around her tiny waist. Her short hair ruffled in some places and her face contorted into a very displeased frown. I can't see her eyes. I want to give them some reassurance, but she's looking down and her bangs do a good job of hiding them.

So I lean my head down and brush my lip plates over the very top of her forehead. She curls even more into me and grabs my collar bone. It feels as if she's trying to get as close to me as she can. The warmth rises in parts of my body I can't think of right now. I shake off the feeling, but every time it seems to be fading it comes back.

I carry her to the car and open the passenger door. I go to sit her in the seat and she doesn't let go. Clinging to me, I sigh softly. I'm not frustrated that she won't let go. It's a sigh of relief. I'm relieved that she will not let go of me.

"Honey, I need you to sit in the seat, please. I'll be right next to you I promise." She hesitantly loosens her grip and I let her slide into the seat. I close the door and get in the driver's seat.

I don't even get to close the door when Kiana climbs on me. Resting her head on my shoulder, stifling tears. Her arms and hands clasped close to her chest. I close the door and hold her. My cheek pressed to hers. I glance down at the bond mark and press my lip plates to it. She sniffles and looks at me. Her blue eyes like crystals. I stare into them and admire the dark blue on the outer iris and the icy blue around the pupil.

Unique.

Finally, she speaks.

"You..y- you."

That's all she says as tears make her eyes shine.

I can't find words to say so I just stare into her eyes.

She looks everywhere, but at my face. Her eyes darting around. I wish and hope that for a moment that she remembers everything. Remembers how much I love her. Remembers the love we had for each other, but the look in her eyes tells me that she doesn't.

Then her eyes finally land on me. They become stone and she looks determined. That look that I know so well, makes my chest swell.

"Thank you." She murmurs and lies her cheek on my chest. I put my hand on her head and run my hand along her side.

"Why were you out there by yourself? Where's Jackson?"

A sob escapes her and she tenses. Something must have happened.

"I-I-I don't know."

She wavers and her body shudders. Her fingers grasp my collar even tighter.

"I- he-"

I shush her and press my cheek to hers.

"What happened. You can tell me everything."

She pulls her head up and looks at me.

"He.. I.."

She seemed to be thinking for a minute before the tears gleam again in her eyes.

She bites her lip and looks at me again.

"I think Jackson raped me."

She sobs. Her voice flying on all intervals as she speaks.

She drops her head while she sobs and I press her to me.

Holding her tightly.

A rush of anger flows through me. That rage that I can never hold back. Kiana was raped and molested all in one night. That makes me furious.

Kiana~ First Person

As Garrus held me to him I felt safer then I ever have. I felt like I belonged in his arms, but something in me was hesitant. I barely know him! Even though I used to I don't feel comfortable trusting him so quickly. All of this was making my head hurt. I need to go home and sleep.

I slow my sobbing down. This was also partly embarrassing to me, but he didn't seem to mind. When he holds me I feel like it's okay to cry. He strokes my hair and softly speaks.

"Let's go to the house. You can tell me what you remember when you're ready."

He turns on the car and he doesn't bother to buckle because I'm lying on his chest. I don't decide to go to sleep, I fall asleep. I'm just too exhausted to stay awake.

The Next Morning~

I wake up with a searing pain in my gut. I can't imagine why other than just being sore from last night. My whole body didn't want to get out of bed, but I had too. I knew that if I didn't start the day I would be in bed all day. For me, being in bed all day does not sound very inviting right now. I'd rather be up and about.

I slump down the hall way and the stairs. As I walk closer to the kitchen I can smell eggs and a hint of bacon. My stomach replies with a loud roar. When I make it into the kitchen Ellena isn't the one standing, making breakfast. It's Garrus...

He doesn't bother turning his head to look at me. It surprises me how he knows it's me.

"Well, there you are. Ellena had to run a couple of errands and won't be back until after lunch. She has her assistants taking care of the other mental patients. She left me to watch after you."

Garrus~ First Person

When Kiana entered the kitchen I felt a sense of... well, her. Her smell her footsteps. It's all overly familiar and to be honest I'm really happy to have it back. After months of looking for her and failing every time...

A sense of relief always rushes over me when I see her, knowing that she's here. After I have finished speaking to her she stands in the doorway. I don't hear any bare footsteps on the tile. That makes me nervous. Now I look over my shoulder at her. Her eyes are lined with light, dark circles, she changed her clothes and looks better than she did last night. She still looks like she had a rough night.

I put down the spatula and turn around. She stares at me. Not moving at all. "Are you alright?" I ask softly. She nods and walks over to me. She grabs a plate and scoops an egg out of the pan and silently takes some bacon that's being kept warm in the oven. "Thank you." She mutters as she pours herself a glass of milk.

Then before I could have asked her where she was going, she left the kitchen with her glass of milk and plate in hand. I stood there a bit stunned... Maybe she has short term memory loss? She walked in the kitchen got breakfast and left. Not even considering my presence.

She may still be in shock about last night, it's probably best not to say anything either. I did tell her to tell me what she remembers about last night whenever she's ready. I'm being selfish. I want her back so badly, but for her own sake I have to be patient.

I cleaned up the kitchen and left out the rest of the food for whoever wants it. A few people came down after I was settled in the living room. They thanked me and either went outside or back upstairs. It was quite a while before I heard a peep of anything. It was around noon when I heard a peculiar sound. It was the strumming of a guitar. I opened the front door and went around to the side porch where I found the noise.

Kiana sits cross-legged, holding the guitar and lightly strumming her fingers across the strings. A faint flashback of a week ago runs through my mind...

~ _I came back to the house from running Ellena some errands. I went to the nearest market and got some various items that had escaped her mind when she went shopping yesterday. I'd volunteered to go get them myself since I needed to get out of the house. _

_I close the car door behind me and a sound that I've never heard of before, sounds. I look toward where it's coming from and see Kiana and Jackson sitting on the bench swing. Kiana's holding an instrument that she runs a long stick across the strings and it makes a very soothing noise. _

_Jackson is holding an instrument that is larger than Kiana's. He doesn't hold it under his chin, instead he holds the top of it with one hand and strums the strings with the other. The harmony of both instruments is amazing. Beautiful._

_I watch them for a second. Kiana's face strains with concentration and a part of a smile when Jackson looks at her. Of course, after I was done awing and I finally found the anxiety to be upset with Jackson. The jealousy sets in._

_I walk past them, trying not to be seen, and enter the house._

Garrus~ First Person

Of course, that was before Jackson 'betrayed' Kiana. We haven't seen hide nor hair of him all day so far. I watch her for a moment until she looks up. A solemnly straight expression was set in her features, but I could see the tears behind the mask.

We stare into each other's eyes for the longest seconds in my life.

"What is it?" She finally asks. Her eyes stone cold. "I'm sorry, Kiana." She looks back down at the guitar and her face softens when she looks back up at me. Her eyes slightly glassy.

"I know."

She murmurs and gets up, setting the guitar down gently on the swing before standing. She walks by me and heads into the house.

Am I doing something wrong?


End file.
